The Menagerie

Exhausted

Eden's cold is better, but she's still not feeling good. This is normally taking the form of not sleeping well and being cranky, but today it was cranky, hungry all the time, and light sleeping punctuated by a couple of screaming sessions. 

Have I ever mentioned that I'm very sound sensitive? 

Anyway, I'm exhausted.  The nature of the arrangement we have to live by is that I'm bearing the brunt of the baby care during the week (roughly 20 hours a day) and trying to work when I can on those days.  Thank God GT is going to be here tomorrow and Friday.  Work is going to seem like a trip to Cancun.  (Or Cornwall, if you have my complexion.) 

Wednesday timekiller

Wall Words.  Credit to my sister Sarah, who mentioned it this morning.  She was right -- I love it. 

Shh...don't tell Emily!

Emily Post, that is.  It's 12 weeks after Eden's birth and I've JUST now finished writing thank yous.  Well, I'd been almost finished for quite a while -- half were done and sent ages ago (and most of the others were written, but I hadn't had time or energy to get their envelopes addressed and sent).  I am terrified that somehow I didn't write someone's gift down and they are secretly upset they didn't get the note. 

That is really embarrassing.  It's not like they were three months late (mostly they were one and two months late, though we're still getting Eden gifts), but still, I'm quite ashamed of myself. I wonder if people think I didn't appreciate their gifts because I'm so late in getting thank yous out the door?   I hope not.  My only excuses are that a) I have a newborn and was pretty sick in the beginning and b) we received a LOT of gifts and finishing took some time.  I actually had to break into a second set (not a box -- a set!) of Crane's cards.

On second thought, I'm not willing to cut myself any slack.

My advice to new moms is to make a very detailed list of gifts -- I was doing very well to get everything written down, but sometimes "cute onesies" isn't descriptive enough for a thank you note one month later.   Write the brand, the color, the size down, too. 

God, I am so gauche. 

And in other news....

CNN has a nice story (lifted from Parenting) about being a new mom -- and the adjustments it requires. 

On my end, there's a new milestone: first cold caught from infant daughter.  Yahoo.  But she's doing better, so at least I've gotten some stuff done. 

At least I've gotten to it...kind of....

At quarter past 10 this morning, I brought a legal pad, some pens, and a large file to review upstairs.  I put it on the ottoman in front of the couch and sat down. 

I hadn't even reached for the file when Eden cried.  She's still sick and is so unhappy. She hates having her nasal passages aspirated, so she writhes around and makes it impossible for me to safely do it.  So when I feed her, she can't breathe well and thus can't create a good seal, so she gulps a lot of air.  She hates to be burped this week, so she screams and writhes more when I try.  But because she's got bubbles, she ends up spitting up -- sometimes spectacularly, as in down (and inside) my shirt. 

Yes, a long day.  And now it's after 11 pm -- and I'm just now sitting down with the file again.  Wish me luck.

Wonderful News!

Lewis & Clark Law classmates Yin and Yang are expecting a baby on February 18! 

In August a law student's fancy turns to E&Es

Because it's that time again (and because I'm up late aspirating Eden's sinuses) I bring back Shelley's Helpful Tips for the First Semester of Law School.  To these I'd like to add five more aimed at school/life balance:

1.  Have fun.  I know what you're thinking -- I could have fun in that meat grinder?  Well, yes.  You're stuck there for three years.  It's grueling. It will expand to fill every waking (and many sleeping) moments of your life if you let it.  It will turn you into a law bore at parties. 

So look for the absurd.  Smell the roses (or daphne or lilac or whatever) when they bloom.  Make friends.  Take at least one class every semester that you don't need but which sounds interesting. 

And if you don't want to do law review, then don't.*  Wear hats. Host lunchtime potlucks with your friends and don't talk about the law while you're eating. Poach faculty parking spots after dark. Take a ferret to class.  Take a dog to class. (And laugh when he poops in the faculty parking lot.)   And yes, I did (or didn't) do all of these things.

2.  Learn your limits. To studying, to staying up late, to dealing with BS, to how much coffee you can drink without visibly shaking.  Then mind those limits.

3.  Learn to ask for help. From your professors when you don't understand something, from your law school friends when you need a favor, from family and outside friends when you're in crunch time around finals. 

4.  Don't forget your partner. I brought Matthew to classes one day every semester and I absolutely recommend this to everyone who goes to school while in a long term relationships.  Matthew got to know my classmates and professors and what it was I did with my days.  He sympathized and could talk to me on a meaningful level about my day-to-day experiences when I got home.

5.  Don't take it so seriously.  At the end of the day, it's just school.  No one's life rides on whether you understand the Erie Doctrine or if your citations are perfect.  You're the only one who cares if you goofed up in class -- no one else even noticed.  In fact, everyone else thinks THEY goofed up when it was their turn. Give it a rest.

*I can't imagine anything more deadly dull than cite-checking someone else's material.  Ugh. 

Baby's first cold

Good times.  At least for Matthew -- I'm writing a memo. 

Apologies to Roger Waters

We're constantly altering songs and singing them to the dog (and now the baby).  For example, I used to sing the hymn "Be Thou My Vision" to Nika, our border collie. Instead of "Be thou my vision, O God of my heart," I'd sing "Be thou my vision, O Dog of my heart."  And for Norris, I adapted a sea chanty. So instead of:

Boney was a-warrior
Away-ay-ya
A warrior, a tarrier
Jean Francois

It became:

Norris is a stinky dog
Away-ay-ya
A stinky and a barky dog
Norris dog

Yeah. We're not all that sophisticated around here. You were expecting what? Motets? This morning, though, we really outdid ourselves.  After I yelled up the stairs, "Norris, you'd better leave that baby alone," when I heard him jingling around, it turned into:

We don't need no tripod doggies
We don't need no Norris control
No barking dogs waking the baby
Hey, Norris, leave that baby alone!

All in all, you're just another dog in the hall.

So...you had to be there.  But we're amused, anyway. 

Stroller decision made

 
I still need to "test drive" one, but I've made up my mind -- the Maclaren MX3.  It takes a carseat (for now), it's maneuverable, adjustable, and has large wheels (Matthew's requirement).  It's also easy to break down, which is my big requirement.  And it ought to work for Eden up to about 50 pounds! 

Now to try to find one for less than the $250-299 range I've seen them in...

Yahoo! It's my Monday!

Thursday and Friday are my guaranteed work days because GT is here to watch Eden.   The weird bit is I don't think I've ever been so excited about working -- it's something like a vacation.  (Only one thing to think about at a time.) And the pressure of knowing I have to pay someone to watch Eden actually makes me work quite a bit harder than I ordinarily do.  I'm not sure what that's like for the work/life balance in the long term, but for now, I'll take it. 

Wipe out

One of those days -- poor Eden couldn't sleep for more than ten minutes, didn't want to eat, then would be starving.  When I did get her to sleep, she'd wake up as soon as I left the room. 

This went on from 8 until 5 -- coincidentally (or not) right when Matthew came home.  We had dinner uninterrupted, and she's still sleeping.  I'm a mess -- did I mention that I developed a splitting headache somewhere around noon, and it's not a migraine?  (Didn't respond to meds.) 

Yep, a fun day all around. 

Malinois in the news

This time as military dogs.

Sunday Baby PSA

Costco is now selling Kirkland diapers in size 1-2.  (At our Costco, the price was $29.99 for the 234 diaper package.)  We also picked up 832 Huggies wipes for $19.99, including a wipes carrier. 

I'm not sure who manufactured the Kirkland diapers, but they seem an awful lot like the Huggies. 

Saturday Randomness

Too tired to come up with a better post, so I give you some random information about me -- the sort of thing you'd learn if you talked to me at a party.  If I had time or energy to go to parties. And if you wanted to talk to me.  In any event:

1. In December, I'll have been married for 15 years.
2. I skipped first grade and I never finished high school.
3. I have a Batman collection -- not so many of the comic books (though I have those, too) but original comic book page pen-and-ink drawings, posters, plates, epiphany cake figurines (from France), that sort of thing.  I have no idea what I'm going to do with it all.  I became interested back in the day with Batman: The Animated Series, which is IMHO probably the best way to introduce kids to noir. 
4. In the last week, I pared myself down to 25 pairs of shoes.  It's part of massive purge of the unnecessary in the house. 
5. The shows I watch as soon as they're TiVo'd these days: House, Eureka, and Mystery!.
6. I did not name my daughter after Eden Theological Seminary (although my first childhood memories were formed there).
7. Some kids play "house."  Another seminary kid and I played "bury," where one of us would lie down on the floor and cover up with a blanket, while the other kid would pretend to read a few words over the body.  Then we'd switch places. 
8. I just sang the preamble to the constitution to Eden, and she grinned at me.  Let's hear it for Schoolhouse Rock.
9. I may love reading etiquette books, but I put my elbows on the table sometimes.  (And I was flummoxed by the butter fork at the University Club.)
10. I went to law school so that I could read and write for a living.
11. Eleven is my lucky number, because my birthday is March 11.  And I think lucky numbers ought to be prime numbers.

When Princess Peach is happy, the rest of us are happy

I swore we'd never use the appellation "princess" with Eden, but somehow I started calling her "Peach."  Then "Miss Peach."  And then "Princess Peach."  (It flows better, what can I say? Let's hear it for alliteration.)

(But I'm not budging on Barbie or Disney.  And no Baby Einstein, because it's owned by the mouse.)

Nanny Update: Bad news, Good news

We've been dumped by our prospective nanny.  (Well, she let us down gently -- she hasn't said no, but she let us know she's "had other offers" and "the drive is a consideration."  It's been almost a week since we last spoke to her.) 

Crushed for a few days afterwards, we were brainstorming and I realized that I have a friend who a) loves Eden and b) might want another job while she's looking for a permanent gig (I think she's up to five now), for maybe 16 hours a week.   And we know and adore and trust her -- what could be better? 

We asked (or rather, I tried to preamble it and Matthew bluntly said, "We want you to watch Eden two days a week.  Would you want to?").  She accepted.  Matthew didn't give me time to say anything else before adding, "OK, this Thursday, then?" 

Better yet, she's my good twin (I wanted to be the evil twin).  Check this out:

Shelley: Minister father (Congregationalist)
Good Twin: Minister father (Baptist)

S: Teacher mother
GT: Teacher mother

S: Red hair
GT: Red hair

S: Law school
GT: Law school

S: Petite
GT: Petite

S: Green eyes
GT: Green eyes

S: Mother's family from North Florida
GT: Father's family from North Florida

S: Eyesight in left eye - 20/400
GT: Eyesight in left eye - 20/400

S: Asthma
GT: Asthma

S: 6 1/2 shoe
GT: 6 1/2 shoe

**

I never thought I would be so excited at the idea of working that I would pay someone so that I could do it, but hey, there are those student loans...

Mactyre's Second Law of WAHMAs

There is an inverse relationship between your baby's mood and the importance of a project and the immediacy of its deadline.  This is represented by the following equation:

I * D = 1/M

Where I=Importance, D=Deadline, and M=Mood of Baby. 

This equation can be complicated by the volume of barking dogs:

I * D = 1/M * B

Where B=Barking dog volume

***************
Yes.  One of those mornings. 

Update

OK, she smiles a lot at me, too. It just seemed like I wasn't getting much this weekend.  A nice play session made up for it. 

Now I'm off to Office Depot and the law library -- yay me.

Green-eyed monster*

I knew that, in having a baby girl, I would have a daddy's girl on my hands -- and that there would be times when I'd be left out. In theory, I'm fine with it, and besides, it makes me all gushy inside.   

But it bothers me -- just a little, tiny bit -- that Eden smiles more for Matthew than she does for me. OK, truthfully -- I'm jealous.  And what gives?  I'm the parent who changes her the most, who feeds her the most, and I'm the one who can always get her to burp and who knows when the cry is the wet diaper cry or the hungry cry or the tired cry....

Don't get me wrong, she smiles at me -- but any time she sees Matthew she beams and the entire room lights up.   I'm trying to rationalize it as an evolutionary trait -- it makes perfect sense for a baby to work hard to get Daddy's attention to keep him around to take care of her. 

Yeah...it didn't help to think about it that way.  I'm still jealous. 

*I do have green eyes.  It's too early to tell if Eden's are green or blue, though.